I Can't Live Without Your Love
by cedricharry
Summary: Cedric remembers the ordeals with Harry in Hogwarts. Voldemortfree, slash, OneShot. I'd say it was a sweet fic.


Cedric Diggory sits in a chair on the front porch of his house. Even though it's dark, he holds in his hand a picture of him and one Harry Potter in their younger days, staring at each other in the Yule Ball, smiling, and he himself thinks nostalgically. Setting down his glass of milk, he looks out into a lava-like sunrise still hidden in the mountains in the distance and lets memories claim a place in his train of thought this early morning.

_The noise of the masses shakes his eyes open. Cedric is standing in the middle of a crowded hallway, watching the people move around him, waving hi to him on occasion. He's in Hogwarts. And that means . . ._

"_Ced." A young, male, barely-maturing voice calls out to him, slightly softly, but a tone he is familiar with enough to recognize it even in the pell-mell of the hallway of people scrambling to get back to their dorms after the last class of the day._

_Cedric turns and sees the Harry Potter of his youth, the Harry he first fell in love with. As Cedric brushes the blond hair that fell across his forehead when he turned, he absorbs Harry's presentable-as-he-can-get appearance and feels a smile tug at the corners of his lips. After a tiring day of school, there was nothing like Harry Potter to calm him down._

_But Harry's demeanor isn't jovial or laid-back—it's aggressive and edgy. "Ced, can I have a word?"_

_Cedric shudders at the familiarity of those words, but acquiesces. "Of course, Harry."_

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Cedric stops his train of thought right there. He pulls himself even deeper into his memories and goes further back in time. To that fateful day that set a new direction for the rest of his life.

_Harry and Cedric were friends. That much was known to everyone else, and that's what Cedric knew he was to Harry, but Cedric couldn't live with Harry being just his friend._

_Cedric realized he was in love with Harry in the middle of October, and he began to crave his touch, his voice, and his presence with every day that they didn't see each other. So on the first of December, he went out on a limb and asked Harry to the courtyard, where they sat on one of cement benches. And Cedric took Harry's warm hands in his, and whispered the truths of his feelings._

"_You're in love with me?" Harry looked up at him._

"_Very much so." Cedric was never one for beating around the bush._

_When Harry abruptly stood up, Cedric stood as well, fearing the worst. But Harry put his arms around him and rested his head on Cedric's shoulder. That's when Cedric saw his whole life ahead of him, quite alright and just like this._

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Cedric smiles at the head-rushy, deep red emotions that he feels at the memory. It's as if he's right there again, sixteen and not twenty-six, young and in love.

And he forces himself to remember the most painful part of his perfect relationship with Harry Potter.

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"_I think we should tell everyone." Harry blurts out._

"_You what?" Cedric blinks several times, incredulous._

"_I don't want to keep hiding." Harry drives on._

"_But,why? You know they can't accept us. They'll hate us, or even hurt us. Is that what you want?" Cedric looks into Harry's eyes, trying to determine what he really feels._

"_Of course not, but I've been hiding my whole life, and I don't want to keep doing that anymore. It'll kill me, Cedric." Harry says with no shake or quiver in his voice, indicating that he has indeed thought this through._

"_Harry, I love you, and I care about you, but I don't think I'm ready to make a decision like this. Not yet. I'm sorry." Cedric says, trying to make be as placating and gentle as possible._

_As he turns to leave, Harry's unmistakable voice rings out through the empty courtyard. "I think we should stop seeing each other."_

_Cedric freezes for several seconds, unable to bring himself to comprehend the enormity of Harry's words. "I'll die if I hide, Cedric. It's better like this, so that I have nothing to hide, and neither do you."_

_He turns around to see Harry's silhouette in the glare of the afternoon sun walk into a hallway and turn around a corner, out of sight._

_Cedric drops onto the nearest bench, head in his hands, water in his eyes and the whole future he had imagined gone with one man._

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Cedric remembers that day like it was yesterday. The hurt and confusion—how did it end up like this? And the days that followed, Cedric remembers the pain. Seeing Harry and knowing he didn't have the option of waltzing over and striking up conversation, or a simple "hi" in the corridors. Harry did not glance at his table during meals, but Cedric's own eyes were trained on his lithe, strong figure almost every meal. And in those circumstances where Cedric and Harry happened or had to speak to each other, it was bitter and with words spoken angrily, and not really meant. Cedric tears up before he remembers that there is still an end to this particular memory.

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_Cedric adjusts the tie on his dress robes, nervous and scared. It's the twenty-fifth of December, the night of the Yule Ball, and he's about to make the most daring move of his life._

_He drags himself out of the Hufflepuff common room and into the corridor just outside the Great Hall, where Cho Chang, his date for the Yule Ball is waiting for him, dressed elegantly. As she loops her arm around his and catches Harry's stare from across the room, nodding acknowledgement, she whispers, "Are you ready to tell him?"_

_Cedric looks at Harry, who is looking at him for the first time in ages. "More than ready."_

_The traditional dance transpires, and when it ends, Professor Dumbledore takes the stage. He raises a hand to silence the excited commotion, eyes landing on Cedric, who looks back at him with a confident nod, before beginning his speech._

"_Tonight, we have a very special performance, as requested by one of our students. So, without further ado, let me introduce to you all, Cedric Diggory!" Dumbledore steps aside, descending from the stage as Cedric departs from Cho, but not before she whispers to him one last time. "Go get him, tiger."_

_Cedric climbs the stage, his black robes billowing behind him, stark and completely recognizable in the silver-white decorations of the Great Hall._

_He glances at the object of his affections, standing wide-eyed and curious with one of the Patil twins, wondering what exactly he's up to, before he says clearly, "I'd like to dedicate this song to Harry Potter."_

_Dumbledore and some of the other teachers smile knowingly, but the whole student body is shocked, staring back and forth between Cedric and Harry._

"_Harry," Cedric says, searching for the right words and suppressing the thrill and fear of being on stage in front of all these people, "I can live without everything else . . . but I'm not sure if I can make it without you."_

_What's going on between these two is startlingly clear now, but anything anyone could've said is drowned out by the ring of guitars, as the song rumbles into the hall._

"_Baby, how'd we wind up," Cedric begins while Cho's heart bursts with pride, "this far apart."_

"_Using words as weapons—like daggers to our hearts."_

_He sees Harry standing in awe, and complete rapture and . . . tears? Are those tears in his eyes?_

"_This stand off of indifference isn't solving anything." Cedric sings, and Harry visibly recoils from the impact of those words. "But, baby, I've been thinking about what I stand to lose. I can live without being right," and Cedric means this, "so if I have to choose—"_

_Drums pound and Cedric raises his voice, "I can't live without your love. I can't live without your touch. The pride I stand to gain… isn't worth the pain. I can't face another day, and I don't care who's to blame. If this is what it takes, I'll be the one to break. I'm not giving up. I can't live without your . . ."_

_Cedric skips to the bridge to get his point across to all these speechless people, but most of all, to Harry. "As we sit here in the quiet, there's a pounding in my head. I feel the weight of a thousand angry words between us—the bitter things we said. So I'm reaching out to you tonight, and I don't care who's wrong and, baby, I don't care who's right. We've come too far to let this slip away now. I'm asking you, I'm telling you, I'm begging you… I can't live without your love."_

_And Cedric sang his heart out to Harry. Amidst the applause and cheers and the throngs of hands reaching out to him, he runs down from the stage, the crowd immediately parting to let him pass. And there was Harry, standing alone. As the stage lights focused on the two of them, Cedric reaches him, pulling a rose from a nearby table, drops to one knee in front of Harry and offers it to him._

_Those really were tears in his eyes, Cedric thinks to himself. He notes Harry's floored and elated expression, full of tenderness and the same love that Cedric himself has always harbored for him._

_With the confetti falling and balloons rising all around him, he gulps and raises the rose to Harry. "I love you, Harry Potter."_

_Harry slowly takes the rose from his hands, and Cedric stands, pulling Harry closer to him by the waist. Harry's eyes say everything, and there is no need for any words—just one, single kiss._

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"Cedric?" A twenty-four year old Harry's voice calls from inside their house. He comes out a second later in his shirt and boxers, like Cedric. "Hey, morning," and he stands behind Cedric, wrapping his arms around his chest and neck while leaning in for a kiss. "You're up early. I mean, not that it's been previously stipulated, but we usually go to watch the sunrise together at six thirty."

Cedric raises an eyebrow, still half-absorbed in the photo and the memories associated with it. "Oh, really? What time is it?"

"It's five thirty." He hears Harry say, along with the jangle of the metal watch on his wrist.

"Well then you're up early, too."

"I was half asleep when I rolled over to hug you and guess what? No Cedric." A pause and shift in Harry's position behind him. "What've you got there?"

"Just an old photo."

"Let me see." Harry slowly takes the picture from Cedric's hands as Cedric wipes a tear away. "Oh." Harry looks at him, understanding at once what had Cedric up all morning.

"I guess I was wrong about them, huh?" Cedric mumbles absently, staring at the deep sunrise spill over from the mountain tops. "Not a single one of them wasn't happy for us."

"You mean the students?"

Cedric nods.

"I guess so. And that's a good thing." A thoughtful pause, and then, "I'll never forget what you did for me that night. That made me fall in love with you all over again, which is ultimately why I moved here with you."

Cedric suddenly stands, taking Harry's hand, and guides him around the chair Cedric had been occupying so they can sit on the wooden bench and cuddle.

"I love you." Is said and echoed while they watch a beautiful autumn morning unfold in Canada.

A/N: The song is Aaron Lines' "I Can't Live Without Your Love", off his Living Out Loud album. Hope you all enjoyed this fic! Comments are very welcome.


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